I want to go to Sagada! Kaso mag rainy season na.. papayagan pa kaya ako?! Or sana maging family outing na lang para sure! at pag ganoon at least wala pa expense sa akin haha sayang, hindi natuloy ung august sagada weekend dahil sa three-week postponed ang exams! bad trip talaga iyon!
But for some reason, I don't like to be in vacation mode just yet. In vacation mode, you have lots of time again to think. And I hate thinking, right? I hate contemplating on things that are not objective, on things that have gray areas, because those are the things that no one really knows the answer. I hate feeling unsure. People who know me knows that I like being right! haha And not knowing for sure, or being uneasy is a weakness that I hate. Maybe that's what drives me to study in the wee hours of the morning, especially when preparing for oral presentations.
Hay... I just cannot help thinking of the "what ifs" in life... I hate it... It's just a waste of time and effort. And more so, when the vacation comes, when there is ample time to just stare out the window (my favorite thing) and suddenly... stuff just comes in my brain that i don't even realize that i'm thinking!
More importantly on my mind right now? Distracting me from exams? I have a friend who humiliated me in front of other people, therefore hurting me. Should I tell or not what I'm feeling? NOT! Simply because I don't want to talk anymore and I just want things to blow over eventually. So here I am, nursing my crushed ego, and the other party just rolls on by, kamustahin ka, as if nothing happened!! Now, that hurts, right? Might as well as not talk to her at all! So... I'm not. And hopefully, I don't have to during the next three weeks sa break. Sana TALAGA hindi na kami magkita at all! Ganoon kalaki ang damage sa pride ko!
Right, meron lang ata ako kaya ganito na naman ako... Distracted... Or easily distracted...
Ok, focus na... I still have three more exams to prepare for...
Mag aral ka nga muna. Yaya ka nang yaya dyan :) hehe! Ako pa niyaya mo, the person who has no time and no money!
ReplyDeleteayaw mo ba yan? at least yinaya kita, ikaw hindi nag-yayaya! tsk tsk...
ReplyDeleteand you have the most money! working ka na anoh hehe
oh no! nanonood na nga lang ako ng movie eh! ayoko ng mag-aral! bad trip hehe
if you don't tell your friend now, it's bound to happen again.
ReplyDeleteshe knows naman that i get hurt when she does it eh. but she did it anyway, though not just in front of me. and she will continue to do it kasi because i know that's what she likes, and i can't stop her from doing what she wants. so... it's a continuous cycle of hurting ego...
ReplyDeletei guess we can't be friends nalang diba? :(
hmm.. usually i try to take away people who have a negative impact on me from from my life, and strengthen my relationships with the ones who don't or who have a positive impact on me :) your call. :) but i think you shouldn't let other people hurt you like that. :)
ReplyDeletei know! thanks! :)
ReplyDeleteHehe. Ako puro tv shows. Kakatamad talaga mag-aral! And to think, it's the last 3 tests nalang. :( nga pala, your legal med notes are in the locker. I keep on forgetting to tell you. :D
ReplyDeleteGood luck sa atin em. And for all it's worth, I'd say tell the concerned person. You never know, maybe he/she's not aware of it that's why he/she keeps on doing it. I don't think there's someone as bad who can stomach doing that on purpose. :D
kala ko you watched tv din yesterday?? dami kayang contrabida! haha there are ppl who are just plain mean and wants the worse for everyone else hehe kahit sa tv lng yan, malay mo may mga real people din behind the characters! kasi iyong mga akala kong sa TV lng nangyayari, may mga kilala akong naeexperience! so you just never know from people...
ReplyDeleteeverything is possible! hehe
what?? sino to? hehehe.. yeah..chismosa talaga ever... :)
ReplyDeleterecently, i decided to cut my ties with a certain person who has just been making my life complicated... it was really hard to do considering that we have been friends since gradeschool...
you just have to figure out whether she's worth it :)
if people just pull you down, let them go :) pero mahirap yan ah..classmate ba to??
"Hay... I just cannot help thinking of the "what ifs" in life... "
ReplyDeleteaahh. lintik yan. i'm infected with that too. ^_^
she's one of my best friends... but i just want to think... no... i just want to decide and convince myself that she's not worth it! haha
ReplyDeletekwento ko sayo pag mag-inuman na tayo hehe
sama ka kay harold ha?! dun na lang tayo magkita at magkwentuhan haha
shet... gusto ko ng mag sem break... hindi na tlga ako maka-aral since... thursday ba? oh no... this is so bad... hehe suicidal na ang psy, surg, at med ko!! huhuhu
nsan na ba support system ko?!! natutulog pa ata eh... tsk tsk... nalulungkot ako at mag-isa dito attempting to study! this is so not working...
marimar! I'm addicted. And I won't deny it. Haha.
ReplyDeleteYeah. I guess you're right.. Where else would the writers get their inspiration from?
i share the same sentiments.
ReplyDeletebut on the other side of the spectrum, these are the days you can rethink and relive and redirect your life...and know which way to go. it may seem that all you will ever think of are the gray areas...but remember that behind those gray spots lies clarity. you just need to find it yourself.
and besides, if ever you feel alone...or you feel sad...you have your forever reliable support system by your side. just waiting for your call...for the chance to be there for you. right?
if this doesnt work pa rin,,,there's the ever caring, ever present San Mig Light/Colt 45/Red Horse, Lychee Cruzan, Margarita, etc that you can always turn to. hahaha. =)
if ayaw mo talaga mag-isip...keep yourself busy! do things. go out. read a book. ah ewan...basta kaya yan! para san pang 'matatag ka'. =) mwahugz. im just a text away.
on second thought, i want sembreak!
ReplyDeletetime to go to the beach. get some fresh air. and get out of UST med building...and pacific suites! hahaha. and just leave all the med stuff behind.
shux. 3 exams na lang...but still, hindi pa rin ako kumikilos. echos talaga.
andami ko ng delikadong subjects...ganto pa rin ako.
bout your best friend...if im in your shoes, i want to know why she's doing that to me...to think she's your "best friend"...she should be sensitive enough to know you're hurting already. besides, im assuming she knows you...and dapat alam nyang she's going overboard. hahaha.
ganyan tlga ang buhay eh... it moves on...
ReplyDeleteyou have different friends now from grade school and high school, because maybe you're not in the same wavelength anymore and you have different interests... not necessarily because you lost touch, though that's also a factor kasi friends are also commitments, diba? if you don't see them as much as before, you lose touch and you lose the closeness you may once had
"change is the only thing constant in this world..."
wow. best friend :)
ReplyDeletehirap yan ah :)
kelan inuman? tara game! hahaÜ sana naman matuloy na ko :) hehehe...
sayang naman. ako rin wala pang naaral. up to now. sunday na! badtrip.
kelangan mag aral. game! dapat study mode tayo! :)
san ka ba? bakit mag isa? sna nag aral tayo :) hehehe...
nanood lang ako greys @ private practice... hihihihi ^_^ bad bad bad....
haha tingin mo ba pag magkasama tayo, maka-aral kaya? hehe baka magyayaan lng tayo mag inuman niyan hehe
ReplyDeleteoh no! sunday na! study mode na... lalo na psych tomorrow so final na ito! hehe
ako nmn nanood ng mga dvd at heroes with my sister (who's also supposed to study with me! haha BI kapatid ko hehe)
I don't have the most money for these reasons:
ReplyDelete1. I am working (at what seems like) for minimum wage
2. I am saving up for New Zealand (I need 60thou show money)
3. I can't ask money from my parents anymore
4. I just don't.
:(
Mag aral ka! Hehe :)
Nag-aaral naman ako ah! Breaktime ang pagreply sa multiply haha
ReplyDeleteSige, yayain na lang kita mag Baguio one time... kasama sila mommy para wala tayo gastos! haha Kaso working ka na nga pala, kelangan pa ng 30-day notice... Tsk tsk... Cge, so dating gawi nalang? Overnight kay kris? Haha oh no... kasama na pala si glenn! =P
Okay... balik aral hehe